Friday, 9 May 2014

Life Recently

by Bex

I keep writing loads of blog posts in my head but have just never had the inclination to get the laptop out lately, even for random browsing.  Any tweets/instagramming/pinning has been via my phone, either in bed or under the duvet on the sofa - basically my two favourite places at the moment!  I can't promise that after weeks of not writing this will even be any good/interesting/worth reading but hey, I'm blogging again and this is just what's been happening lately along with other random thoughts whirling round my head.  (It's mostly about pregnancy, because, well that's pretty much taken over my life for now.)

A couple of weeks ago on Friday Nik and I drove down to Durham to spend his birthday weekend with his parents.  Somewhere between Glasgow and Carlisle I started sobbing uncontrollably.  Nik noticed and obviously asked me what was wrong and I just kind of sobbed at him.  Straight away, he said "is it because you're so happy?"  He said he could tell it wasn't upset crying and basically just knows me so well, even at my most emotional.  Obviously I blame the hormones but I think just being in the car, not feeling nauseous (I was snacking ALL the way down for fear of being sick at the side of the A1!), with time to think about everything just had my mind drifting back to when we were convinced this would never happen for us.  Every time I think about our mini Ms (we haven't come up with any nicknames for them), it's just overwhelming.  I can't wait for the fun symptoms to start!!

My nausea (and what I want to eat) is still changing frequently.  Lately it's bad from early evening until I fall asleep, sometimes way later than planned/needed due to worsening nausea.  Some weeks I throw up every night (which usually gives me a window of feeling better to try to get to sleep) and some weeks I just lie suffering wishing I was unconscious!  It's certainly not easy this growing humans malarky!  I'm also fairly constantly burping like a champion but luckily don't have heartburn yet.  Anyway, looking at the positive side it is no longer coming in waves ALL day and despite it being pointed out that no nausea can mean just as healthy a pregnancy, I'm still seeing this as a good sign that everything is as it should be.  Basically that thought is what keeps me going when it gets bad!  It means I still have nice healthy levels (most likely doubly so) of those important hormones rushing around me helping our babies grow and do everything they should.

I've just received my appointments through for 'booking in', all our screening tests and then our 12 week scan the week after.  I'm so excited to see the babies again and actually be able to identify more than just their beating hearts!  :)  Obviously I am anxious to know that everything's OK and progressing as it should for both babies as well and we don't have long to wait now.  Plus, more pictures, yay!

I've now lost 8lbs since becoming pregnant, but I've been reassured by many that this is often the case at the start and my tummy is definitely still getting bigger!  I honestly have NO IDEA how so many women go through these first few months in secret.  First of all, there's no way I would have got away with it at work given how sick I was feeling the first few weeks.  Even though I would quite often eat a lot and eat random things anyway before I was pregnant, the fact that so many food smells made me nauseous and I was suddenly eating such a restricted diet, never mind the odd retching incident would have definitely tipped them off if they didn't already know!  Secondly, the reassurance and advice I've received on Twitter from all the mums and fellow mums-to-be has been so valuable!  I've never been one for keeping things to myself anyway (clearly!) but to get through what is surely one of the most horrible stages [I do realise I may change my opinion on this as other nasty symptoms appear (I have been warned), even if my sickness improves there may be worse to come, not to mention labour!] with no support other than from my husband would have been SO hard for me.  Thank you to everyone who's been keeping me sane!  Despite being over the moon about finally being pregnant which I was so afraid I'd never experience, it's still difficult to stay upbeat when feeling so rubbish so much of the time.

As for my tummy, given the fact that I am now the lightest I have been for at least the past 6 months, I'm taking my growing tum as a nice early bump.  I know at 10 weeks that may seem unrealistic but it's never been this big and since there are two wee babies in there, I'm kind of hoping it's not just bloating although it is definitely always bigger in the evenings.  I should probably be scared of how big it is already as I'm very aware of how big it might get with our two wee bundles in there!  Eeek!

Belly at 8 weeks - I used to be able to suck that in!  ;)

10 week belly
- please excuse my roughness, I have just been sick again, sigh!

I can't help it, I'm just so excited by my belly!

Since my writing and thoughts are all so random at the moment and I really want to document my pregnancy (especially since it will most likely be my only pregnancy), I did a quick google on ways to record things so I can add a bit more structure to my pregnancy posts and remember all the things I want to.  I've chosen a few questions from various sources/blogs/forums to have a regular update.

How far along: 10 weeks

Size comparison: green olives

Baby development: now a foetus, fingernails have grown, can kick and swallow

Weight gain: -8lbs

Cravings: cheese on toast (not strictly a craving, just my favourite thing to eat right now)

Symptoms: evening sickness, tiredness, definite small bump forming

I may add more things as I think of them or have more to remember.  Since I can still remember my 8/9 week answers I'm just going to add them below since I'm so behind on blogging everything!

How far along: 8 weeks

Size comparison: kidney beans

Baby development: tail disappearing, webbed fingers & toes growing

Weight gain: -5lbs

Cravings: potato waffles, cheesy mash (not strictly cravings, just pretty much all I want to eat)

Symptoms: all day sickness, tiredness, possible beginnings of a bump

So, that's all I can think of right now.  I'm sure I have plenty more things to write about, including our recent weekend exploring Sussex for the first time.  I hope to get back to blogging more regularly but it really depends on how I'm feeling.  I usually love writing while watching TV in the evenings but since I've been mostly sleeping or vomiting in the evenings it's been the last thing on my mind!  Now I have some more time on my days off without any more trips away planned I will hopefully find some time in the day to sit down and chill at home.  :)  Either way, I certainly won't be keeping up with my usual writing frequency of most weekdays (you know Roz has taken over Tuesdays already when she has time to write), but I would like to write something at least once a week, I miss my blog!

3 comments:

Rebecca said...

Hey bex, I've never commented before, though often read. I'm so happy for you, enjoy your bump! I got big quickly, but then didn't grow again til about 5 months really, a lot of it was bloat with me and then the baby filled the space! For me there was nothing worse than the sickness, so I hope it goes for you soon. Eat whatever you can, when you can. Xx

Lucy Stendall Photography said...

Hey Bex, I remember that early bump feeling too. Like Rebecca, mine never went down. It's so lovely to hear your excitement and anticipation leap of the page with your words, your story is an inspiration x ps. glad you weren't sick by the side of the A1.

jasmine nile said...

thanks ...........

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